Jubilee of Hope 2025: My Greatest Weapon in the Battle with Anxiety is to Lean on Hope

Living with Anxiety

I remember standing by the door of my preschool classroom with tears streaming down my face.  “Why did Mom leave me here?” I thought as my heart pounded in my ears.

My first memory of anxiety.

Our kindergarten class had a field trip, so my mom dropped me off.  I didn’t realize I was early, but upon finding the empty classroom, I hid in the coat room and cried, thinking everyone had already left.

Anxiety.

I remember scanning the cafeteria in 7th grade. Would I be able to find a friend to sit with in the sea of faces? I experienced the same panic every quarter until the day I graduated high school.

Anxiety.

Walking the cows out to pasture after the evening milking.  Hearing the neighbor's dog barking much closer than usual.  Feeling exposed out in the open while my greatest fear approaches.

Anxiety.

Running from my car to the house on a late night.

Anxiety.

I lie in bed, convincing myself that the sound of my heartbeat in my ear is a stranger’s boots coming down the hall.

Anxiety.

I could tell you story after story of how anxiety has crippled my life.  The interesting thing about it is that I didn’t know that I even had anxiety until well after I was married.

Because I’m a natural people-pleaser, I always considered myself to be a laid-back and chill person.

Although my external appearance would look calm and collected, the voice in my head would be jumping up and down, screaming.

“That’s not fair!  You hurt me!”  It would say, as a smile crossed my face and I assured the perpetrator that it was totally fine, and their words or actions didn’t affect me.

“What an idiot!  I can’t believe you would do/say something so dumb.  No wonder everyone is laughing AT you!” The voice would scorn as I exteriorly laughed off a minor incident.

And the same voice that taunted me in the cafeteria is still there today anytime I go somewhere.  It’s why I always arm myself with a friend, sister, or one of my kids.  “What if you don’t know anyone?  Where will you sit?  I bet you will look like a complete idiot showing up all alone!”

I recently was asked to give a talk at my church. Earlier that day, TWO of my kids ended up in the principal's office for disciplinary reasons. That demon voice had a heyday as I walked up to the podium: “What a fraud! You are telling families how to pray when you yourself are failing as a parent! They should have asked someone who actually has their life figured out!”

Alright, sweet friends, that was vulnerable.  I really let you into the inner recesses of my soul.  Can I trust you with my vulnerability?

Anxiety and Hope

Now you know my struggle with anxiety.

Leah in a candid shot with her two youngest sons.

Anxiety is a joy-stealing monster!

Perhaps that is why I am breathing in the Jubilee message of hope!

I am filling my lungs with the oxygen of “Our Hope”- Jesus, the door of my salvation.

Pope Francis wrote in Spes Non Confudit, “Hope does not disappoint,”

“Everyone knows what it is to hope.  In the heart of each person, hope dwells as the desire and expectation of good things to come despite our not knowing what the future may bring.  Even so, uncertainty about the future may at times give rise to conflicting feelings, ranging from confident trust to apprehensiveness, from serenity to anxiety, from firm conviction to hesitation and doubt… For all of us, may the jubilee be an opportunity to be renewed in hope.  God’s word helps us find reasons for that hope.”

 He later states, “The death and resurrection of Jesus is the heart of our faith and the basis for our hope.”

And, “Through our witness, may hope spread to all those who anxiously seek it.  May the way we live our lives say to them in so many words: ‘hope in the Lord!  Hold firm, take heart and hope in the Lord!’  May the power of hope fill our days as we await with confidence the coming of the Lord Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and glory, now and forever.”

Hope in the Lord

My greatest weapon in my battle against anxiety is to lean on hope.  The prayer I turn to the most is the simple phrase from St. Faustina, “Jesus, I trust in You.” 

This short prayer helps me to get out of my head and brings me back to the present moment. 

I don’t know if there will be scary monsters around the next corner, but I only know that my hope is in Jesus Christ, who has defeated even death.  I have nothing to fear.  No social anxieties, proverbial “bad guys,” not even dogs are a match for Him.

Friends, let’s face our anxieties head-on this week.  Let’s label them as such and give them to Our Lord.  Let’s find ourselves in the present moment, not anxious about the past or worried about the future. 

Anxiety is a heavy cross that so many of us carry, but perhaps through it is our very salvation.

“We boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.”  -Rom 5:3-4

Until next time, your sister in Christ,

Leah

-If you are looking for an amazing resource to help you cope with anxiety, I HIGHLY recommend you check out our Spotify playlists! All three are filled with powerful songs that will move your heart back to Christ and away from the troubles that burden you.

You can check them out here-

Prayer Playlists | Catholic Country Chronicles